This was me—happy and loved but screaming for help on the inside. I’m the blonde with two chins, in case you had doubts. Lost and defeated, I allowed myself to gain more than seventy pounds between my two pregnancies. I never lost the weight and honestly had given up on enjoying the reflection I saw in the mirror every day. I made excuses. I lied to myself. I indulged in self-hate and eating to solve my everyday stresses and worries. I drank a large Dr. Pepper every day as a treat and ate fast food at least four times a week. I did not exercise. I was dying on the inside, while trying to create the “everything is wonderful” image among my family and friends.
In May 2013, I had a meltdown on my back porch while thinking about who I had allowed myself to be. Was I really agreeing to be unhappy for the rest of my life? Was I really giving up? While searching for a way to motivate myself, I learned about GODFIT. The catch phrase in the logo really got me interested: “Through Love, Serve”—catchy, right? I decided to give it a try.
The first thing that drew me to this program was the idea that it wasn’t designated as a weight-loss program. I had already failed lots of those. Motherhood, crazy schedules, and craving comfort, I’d give those programs the slow fade after two weeks, and brush it off that it just wasn’t for me.
The words staring at me on the inside cover are what gave me hope that perhaps this could stick: “Six weeks to pursue God through spiritual disciplines, healthy choices, and physical fitness.”
Pursue God? Pursue God! Had I ever really pursued God in my past failed endeavors? The answer, plain and simple, was no. I decided that perhaps there was something to this idea that showing devotion in God’s faithfulness would help me get over my hurdles of being obese; having low self-esteem and self- hate; and feeling defeated. I had given my life to Christ. Why couldn’t I give him my biggest struggle? Because I was embarrassed?
I knew I was prone to fail, but this time would be different. This time, I was going to view this journey to reclaim my health as an act of worship to the Lord. I would seek strength through him, and I would devote my habits and health to God in a way that would please him. GODFIT set me in the right direction from the start.
As a mom of two toddlers, my life can be pretty hectic. Squeezing in time for myself is a struggle, and one of my biggest excuses was that I simply did not have time to get to the gym. The workouts in GODFIT helped me debunk that myth! For me, fitness now happens in my living room, with two children mimicking my every move and often hanging from my appendages. ThThe workouts in this program are intense but easy to fit into my schedule. They also encourage me to include God in my workouts by a simple prayer at the bottom of the workout. I love that.
The metabolic style of workout is my favorite. My four-year-old loves the names of the moves and yells out to me, “More sumo squats, Mommy!” By the end of this twenty-minute circuit, I’m sweating, laughing, and feeling great.
This journey has been hard work. Besides wading through my four-year-old emotions, it has been the hardest thing I’ve ever done. There were days when I wanted to quit. There were weeks when I didn’t see any weight loss. There were words that shouldn’t have been muttered. There were tears of pain. Despite all my excuses of the past, I was devoted this time. I stuck with it, and those prayers that I prayed before every workout, run, and session were answered. The Lord gave me strength, like he said he would. He was faithful. God is such an awesome and powerful God who cares for his children.